How to prevent tough feedback conversations from going badly

July 16, 2024

So you had a bad feedback conversation and now you’re avoiding it like that root canal appointment with your dentist. I get it. I’ve been there. We all have. 

When a feedback conversation goes poorly, it can validate all of our fears and hesitations about giving feedback in the first place – and yet, facing these fears head on and leaning into giving more feedback is the EXACT thing that’s going to alleviate these fears. 

On the podcast, I’ve shared you some frameworks for how to deliver feedback, like Situation, Behavior, Impact, which helps us deliver our feedback in a specific and actionable manner. On today’s episode of Managing Made Simple, I share what to do DURING THE CONVERSATION if the feedback isn’t landing or the conversation is spiraling. 

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Key takeaways from the episode

1. Ground Yourself Before the Conversation:

Going into a feedback talk feeling like you’re about to walk into a lion’s den? Stop right there. Take a few minutes to ground yourself. Deep breaths, short meditation, whatever works to regulate your emotions. It sets the tone for a constructive conversation.

2. Stay Calm and Validate Emotions:

Feedback can be emotional—for you and your team member. If someone gets defensive or even sheds a tear, remain cool. Validate their feelings without jumping into a debate. Simply saying, “I understand this is hard to hear,” can make a world of difference.


3. Shift to Solutions and Follow Up:

Don’t get tangled in a web of defensiveness. Have a plan to steer the conversation towards solutions. And crucially, schedule a follow-up. This shows your commitment to their growth and helps keep accountability on track.

Feeling stuck with feedback dynamics in your team? Don’t sweat it. Listen to the full episode to get all the tips and tricks that will make feedback less awkward and a lot more productive.

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Ready for some personalized guidance? I work with teams across industries—from tech giants like Google to small businesses like marketing agencies and law firms—helping them nail these tricky conversations. If your team’s feedback game needs a boost, let’s talk.

For more targeted support, email me at hello@liagarvin.com and let’s chat. Together, we’ll make feedback your team’s secret weapon for skyrocketing performance and trust.

Meet Lia Garvin

Lia Garvin is the bestselling author of UnstuckTEDx speaker, host of the top podcast Managing Made Simple and team operations consultant with experience leading team operations across Google, Microsoft, Apple, and Bank of America. As the Founder of the The Workplace Reframe business consulting firm, Lia uses the lens of “disruption without destruction” to equip innovative organizations of any size and industry with the tools to cultivate inclusive, motivated, high performing teams resulting in higher retention, more efficiency, and better business results. She is a sought after expert in the media, featured across Inc, FastCompany, ABC News, CNN Business, US News & World Report, HBR, Yahoo, and TV News.

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